On Depression…

Depression is the dark night of the soul

The one that begins to take a toll

On your health, friendships, relationships and overall wellness

No one sees the moments when you’re in a mess

No one talks about the days when you can’t get out of bed

When anxiety, shifting moods, and sadness leaves you in dread

Everything feels like too much, even talking seems to hurt

You wear the same old clothes and forget about your favorite shirt

You forget to eat because you have no appetite

You ask yourself, “How many more days of this fight?”

You begin to wonder how you ended up in this plight

There is HOPE my dear

The sky may seem dark now but it will slowly become clear

Tell your truth to someone that you care about

And let them guide you along the healing route

The path of light and well-being awaits you

Wear your best outfit with the brightest hue

And always remember, I love you

Unapologetic

Do not tell me who to be

For I am me

A young woman, carving her own identity

In your beliefs and traditions you dress me

I want to be my own, set me free

For heck’s sake, it’s the 21st century

 

 

 

 

Red flags

In a moment of despair, I reflect and think to myself

How could I have missed the red flags?

Because darling, red is the color of love

You had been blinded by what you perceived to be love

But in disguise, it wasn’t pure, unrefined love

Instead, it was filled with deceit and manipulation

I thank God for bringing me the revelations.

Je T’aime

You utter those 3 words with pure intent

They drape across your lips like honey

I…love…you

Making sure to pause in between

Like some sacred chant to the universe

That would bind us together

Hidden in that phrase lies sacrificial endearment

Your heart worships mine

Your chosen efforts, uber divine

You ask me…

You ask me what’s my favorite date

But I don’t have a definite answer as when deriving in Calculus

Too many to count on these uneven fingers of mine

In fact, I favorite them all in the same way a grandparent does with their grandkids

I want to have an answer though

You see, I’m not used to being quiet anymore

I will have an answer for everything asked of me

So my answer is this: every single moment spent with you laughing until I build abs

 

Undress for me.

Undress for me slowly

Take off your inhibitions, one by one

Next, remove the preconceived notions which you hold about the world

Purify yourself with oil and sweet fragrance

Allow the moon to behold your beauty as I have

You make the sun envious when you bask in moonlight

For the night doesn’t own you; in fact, no one does

You are your own

Barefoot girl dancing to the beat of her own drums.

 

She will be loved.

A while ago, I made a list of 10 things I desired in a potential future partner. My outlook on love had became bleak due to certain circumstances. Anyways, I still made my list and prayed over it. I even told God that I hope I’m not asking for too much. Silly of me. My Father says ask and ye shall receive as long as it’s in His will for my life. Turns out they had 9/10 of the things I asked for. I mean, I couldn’t blame them for even getting 90%. I didn’t expect perfection. Heck, maybe I’m one of the few people that still watch foreign films (Bollywood, French, Asian, etc). Fast forward a bit and we fulfilled the final criteria on my list. He’s somewhat of an overachiever like myself, wanting 100% instead of 90%.

Time passes and I find myself starting to laugh again. His energy and laughter was infectious. He could light up a room with his jokes and views on different subject matters. I went about my usual volunteer work and when I saw him in sight, my curiosity piqued. What was he doing in my space I began thinking to myself. He dared me to eat a cookie dipped in queso and the few of you who know me, know I DO NOT turn down a challenge, especially when it comes to food. I was about to dip my cookie but before I could, he stopped me, smiling slyly. “You owe me ice cream” for even daring me I said. And so we had ice cream and chatted for what seemed like ages.

It’s refreshing to have someone that massages your intellect ever so often. Sometimes we both look back and wonder how did it all happen. Was it divinely orchestrated? It was as if a higher power removed the veils from our eyes and opened our hearts and minds. We say this because we shared the same environment for years but never took notice of each other until the time in which this organic affinity formed. There was no pressure at all whatsoever. It was like a sunflower blooming with its face turned towards the sunlight. The more light it received, the more growth and change followed. It’s a new season. Spring has sprung.

 

 

Love will find you.

If there’s anything I’ve learned about love, it’s that it will find you in your mess and NOT at your best. Love will wrap you in its arms so divinely that all of the imperfections you once saw in yourself will fade into the abyss. Love is the best form of medication along with music and other elements.

You will begin questioning yourself what kind of sorcery is this. When it comes, embrace it with every fiber of your being. Yes, there are risks involved but life itself comes with many risks. There is the risk of heartbreak or you finding out later that it’s not what you wanted…but how will you know if you don’t try? Take the leap of faith when the time comes. Andre Gide himself said, “You can never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore” and I couldn’t agree with him anymore.

The best advice is…..PATIENCE. Like I mentioned before, it will find you when you LEAST expect it to. Like a thief in the night, it will come. It will restore and rejuvenate the pieces of your soul. And when you find the right kind that adds to your well-being and growth, nurture it like you would with a plant. Feed it daily with kind words, compassion, and encouragement for many days of your journey together.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Beauty left him in a trance

The way mermaids do with sailors

I’ve drown him in my speech too often

Wherever did he learn to breathe underwater?

No one knows…

He’s got his gape on the outermost ring of my iris

“Why do you look at me like that?” I inquire.

“You are so precious,” he whispers.

And my pearly whites make their debut in full fashion

This heart of mine can’t help but overflow with gratitude for such a wonderful being.

 

Traitor

Deceit was his mother tongue

Revelry was of his essence

And when the time came that he had overdone himself, he would resort to purification

Hoping that it would wash the debauchery away

He had a way of bringing women to their knees

Seducing them with false premises and hopes

They never bore fruit, however

One day, he met his match

A woman whose face could launch 1,000 ships

It wasn’t Helen of Sparta, but rather Ann

Ann was a visionary; She possessed psychic powers

She could sense when it was going to pour

She could sense his pretension miles afar

The two often striked bows and arrows

Until one day he was left pierced

Ann didn’t have the courage to look back

After all, she was fed deception

And was unable to differentiate any good intention.